I forget what time I started my break!

I've had a long day.
My mom had heart surgery this morning to remove a recorder they had implanted into her chest about two years ago. She went in at 6:45am. I didn't even fall asleep last night until five. I made muffins at around four and brought them to work. My team was overjoyed.
I got a call around 1230 to say that my mom was okay. I was so relieved. I knew the surgery wasn't too serious, but still. Everytime I know she goes to the hospital I get really anxious.
I'm so thankful she's alright.



I barely write in here anymore. I have to get back in the groooooove.

Call centers...

Are the bane of my existance. I hate them.

Maybe because I work in one.

cody read this thing

I am most definitely tripping right now.
Seeing the things t ype pop up on this cr==screen are crazy
is crazy
i'm not editing this.
everyeone in while i'll make s an error and backspace
but tahts because i do it right then, you know
i dont proofread. im not proofreading.

i have energy.
i have lightnin in this bottle
blue green red lightning.
my arms are light.
the energy is weghing down my arm
i need to play.


i wish
if i broek this bottle oe\pen
i want the energy to fill my room
the lightning
the colours
i want to see it and touch it


this music is going with everything.

xxx


i washed my hands
my face melted
if i rn my hndS WHOA THERE CAPSOCK
if i ran my hands er my face i could pull it offf
i can see why some people may have bad trips
mmy hands are disconnected
theyre just typing whatever they feel like
i have energy in my lap.


whoa therrrrrre
whoooooooooooooooa.
i haveno horse.
hahaha
this is not gonna make sense tomorrow
none at alllllll
theres a polar bear in my energy lamp


i have a soft face.
i can play symphonies.


i feel music.


what if this bottle of lightning was your penis
haha
oh gosh
bad pornos.
look at my haaaaaaaands.

the ceiling dances.
i can see the blood moving through my veins.
i can feel mylungs. i feel myself breathing.

just breath.
close your eyes..... and breath.
this is not the song.
this is life.
haha. my eyes are closed.
type type type.
merry christmas.


my room is not as big as i hadthough


do you think blind people take mushrooms
holy crap.

do not lick the lightning bottle.
it is a bad idea.



lag confuses my trip.
is it because i am shrooming
or is window messing up




he$he

oh dear.

my ahir is nice.
hair


i can not describe how amazing this lightning is.
lightning in a bottle.
what a tripper's concept.


what if penguins
had lightning bottle tummys.


can you feel yourself breahte
i ambeing ataken over.


now ik now hy people listen to trance music.


i am trying to convince myself
it is adream
a coma a

what is that feel\\\ing on my leg

i talked to brandon
and cody called
and then i couldnt hear brandon
i thought he was gone
but he saaaaaaaaaiiiid
he was still there, talking
BUM BUM BUM
hey have you e ver seen tahat moveie about the monster
under y our bed

THERS A VAGINA IN MY CLOSET
...
that is wrong.
that is not what i was going foooooooor.

this music is forever.



gnomes.

Can you imagine if I popped out a baby?

The day after I graduated, my boyfriend proposed to me. I was seventeen. He was twenty two, in the army, and going to Japan. I was incredulous. I said no. Shenanigans occurred. We split up. About a year ago, he IMed me in order to yell at me about harassing his new girlfriend. I wasn't aware I was doing such thing, and after about thirty minutes of him freaking out he realized it wasn't me. He said something about how he hopes I die, and that was the last time I talked him.

My grandma bought him up a couple days ago, asking how he was. I had no idea. To be honest, I kind of forgot about him. I hadn't thought about him in ages. I found his myspace and (like a total creeper) checked out his photos. It turns out he got married in June, and his new eighteen year old girlfriend is pregnant. It weirded me out. Not because I was upset or anything, just because that could have been me.

If I had ignored my senses, went with my silly seventeen year old concept of "true love" and thrown caution and family to the wind, I'd be in Japan. I'd probably have already popped out a baby, and very well may have been pregnant for a second time. I wouldn't have known anybody over there, and there's no way I could have got a job. I don't speak Japanese, you guys (little known fact?). I would be barefoot, with babies, stuck in my army base house. I don't really know why I'd be barefoot, but it fit well.

I'm just so amazed at this concept of how different my life could have been. I'm glad I made the decision that I did. Truly happy. I may have been heart-broken, self-hating, and slightly retarded after I declined his request... but it worked out for the best.


On the flip side, if I were on an army base in Japan... I'd have a lot of weapons for the zombie apocalypse.

Belleleeehehrrhggj

I was going to make this an actual blog entry about how I need to get out more and stop being such a hermit. But that's pretty boring.

So instead, I found this picture and decided to put it up.

It's much better than my self-analyzing.

Things I Think About as I Stand in the Dark and Wait for the Bus.

I am insane. I'd like to preface with that, just in case you weren't aware and are for some reason aghast at my thoughts.

Pyramid Head.

Even if you never played the video games and saw the really erie sequence wear he's molesting a nurse-You must have seen the movie. At night, the evil comes. The church rings a bell to signal the town's impending doom (and to say OMG COME BACK INSIDE.) Too late? Well, Pyramid head waltzes up and RIPS YOUR SKIN OFF YOUR BODY.

Kryll

Gears of War (the first one). COME ON YOU GUYS. They come out at night, eat you to bits. It's only in the light that you are safe.

Well guess what, everybody. THERE IS NO LIGHT AT MY BUS STOP. I AM GOING TO DIE.

Oh, look at that. It's five thirty. Time to go outside. In the dark.=[

I have a stye on my eye (how 'bout some pie, little guy?)

I hate saying that. Firstly, because it rhymes way too much. Secondly, because it's grooosss and I wish I didn't.

Anyway. There's a stye on my left eyelid. It's big, pink and painful. I've been shoving warm towels on it non stop and it's finally starting to go away. The problem? Styes are filled with fluid.

Which means the fluid is leaking out.

On my eye.

EWWWWWWWW.

In other news, I'm turning my team's row into Whoville for Christmas. I'm pretty sure it'll look exactly like this: